Today I have been feeling into how it is that we manage our energy. What is it that we give energy to that either feeds us in positive ways or takes up towards more negative spaces.

Yesterday I found myself, “trapped in the internet” - before I even realised I had sent hours of my time on skimming- through things that are really of no interest to my heart / soul.

As I am in trapped in that cycle I can feel my energy contracting and depleting, and nonetheless I cannot stop myself from doing it. These are patterns of self sabotage, patterns which keep us depleted and unconscious. I know the best, MOST LOVING, thing to do is to get off the internet and focus my energy elsewhere, where I am brought back into the heart and into my center, where I realign with biggest most expanded part of myself.

Impressively enough, I am aware of these patterns, sense the energy and I am many times not able to bring myself back to wholeness. It is like in that process part of me dies or fractions.

When this happens it is not about beating myself up for not doing the correct thing, but instead it is about taking care of myself, really looking into this pattern and seeing the part of the self that is lacking love. If I love myself, if I want to be loving to myself then perhaps next time it really won’t happen - just like that, as a step and a process to loving myself a bit more.

As I write these words, I notice the power that we give into actions and thoughts - those things I read on the internet were still in my head today, and they were not thoughts containing the frequency of harmony, love, upliftment. It was more thoughts of comparison, unworthiness. And these are sometimes so strong in our cellular memory that they are very hard to push away back to where they came from.

Therefore, today, right now as I sit here I am going to embrace myself and make a firm declaration to move forward releasing these thoughts and choosing the most positive loving thoughts for myself.